Tick tock tick tock…times running out and I have to decide and decide now, my mind is playing tricks on me again. What happens when you’d want someone else to decide for you, no one comes forward; what happens when you don’t, the entire world jumps right in.
Do I wait for life to happen or do I pounce at it…figuring out what happens between the days I think from the days I don’t think about it.
I am suffering from multiple thoughts disorder (YES IT IS A DISEASE-I kid you not), cracking inside my head. Most of the time of my head’s echoing the most retarded tune.
I want to live in an empty white clear space.
Listening to loud music isn’t drowning out the gibber, writing’s not helping either. I have perfect instincts for others, ironically; I can’t trust ‘em for me though.
I am at the top of my game at work, I ace at it. That’s not enough I realize and I don’t know what to do. I may have lost all sensibilities towards the other side. The grass is no longer green and it feels like I am going to be running away AGAIN!
Chronically disabled by the works of my own head, it’s not a pretty sight. Antagonism is taking the best of me and it’s getting worse.
I’ve stopped wishing-life is going to happen afterall ;)
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